As the saying goes...

The old saying goes "Life is short, make the most of it". I ask myself how does one do that? My idea vs. your idea of making the most of it can be drastically different. There are so many ways one can make the most of their life. Some people may think that making the most of their life might be just by being a parent. Or by taking trips around the world. Helping out others in need.

Tonight I had been thinking about how I would make the most out of my life. I have an okay life so far. I would not call it great by any means, but its okay. There are a lot of things I sure wish were different. There is so much left that I want to do and accomplish in this life of mine. I can see what they are and I can see me doing them. I just don't see the grayness between where I am now and then. HOW do I get to where I want to be?

Hard work? Well yes, I know that. And I do nothing but work hard. The funny thing is I feel like I have NOTHING to show for it. The harder I work the less I have to show. But hard work is said to get you to the places you want to go and need to go. Well so far I'm going no where fast. Hmmm... makes me wonder if I have the right perspective on this.

Dreams? Oh I have a lot of those. I dream about traveling the world. Traveling the USA. Singing. Writing. Taking pictures of beautiful things. Owning a home. Being married again (this time happily). Finishing my education. Opening my own business. Being truly happy.

Its so hard doing things now days. What makes it even harder is being plagued with self-doubt. I totally act like I have sooo much confidence in myself. When I really don't. My feeling on that is that the more I act like I have confidence the more it will come. Right idea or wrong? So far its not working. But time will tell I guess. Days and nights spent alone are never good for me. And seeing others doing things that I would love to be doing is even worse. But there is nothing I am doing now that is holding me back (so I think, please correct me if I am wrong) from getting what I want. Its just that it seams like life likes to throw up all over me. And let me tell you, I'm tired of it.

xoxo,T